New Year's in Goa

I finally made it to the beach and I've fallen completely in love with Goa. It's picturesque and the music is soooo good. I will be spending my days on the beach with a book and a beautiful sound system blaring behind me. The music reminds me of home....which has been surprising since Goa is known for it's Trance. And don't get me wrong, this place is full of trance and full of Isrealis. But Isrealis are, for the most part, beautiful and Trance is, for the most part okay sometimes. And I promise I won't turn into a trance head. I know that Goa has a way of doing that to people. But I will get a tan and I'm sure I will be dancing quite a bit for the next month....and sometimes it might be to trance and sometimes I might like it. Qite a shift from life in the monastary I must say. But I love the simple pleasures of life...sunshine...good food...a good book...dancing...dancing....dancing. I'm reading the best book and I think everyone should read it. It's called "The Lives of a Cell" by Lewis Thomas. If you come across it read it. It's a bit technical at parts, but with a base knowledge of biology it's pretty easy to digest. It talks about a wide range of science topics and the way in which we communicate and interact as a species comparing our relations to things like mitocondria and ants. Ants are facinating creatures. Do you know that they raise livestock and have slaves and child labor! Wow...yes you were all right, I am on the other side of the world with my head stuck in a book. But it is a great book and I haven't missed any monkey fights or night markets...or New Years silliness. Happy New Years. I love you all.

Christmas on the Ganges was surreal

That had to be one of the greatest nights of my life.It was so much fun, the boat party was a complete success in every way. I can't wait to show photos. The boat was just covered with flowers and going to the flower market to get the flowers was sooo exciting. There was a herd of Indians crowded around laughing at us try to haggle. We were the only white girls in the market and by the end they were putting flowers on us....oh it was one of my favorite memories. I just fell in love with Varanasi in every way. It was difficult to leave, but I am so anxious to get to the beach. I've been dreaming about it. I've been land locked for a longer period of time then in my whole life. I'm so glad to see the open waters of Bombay. The trip took 33 hours on the train. Crazy! That is too long to be on a train. We are now in Bombay for the day. Bombay is a proper city.....with sidewalks and cars, not like the rest of India. It feels weird to be here. Tonight we leave for Goa. I can't wait. I feel like my whole trip has been in anticipation of getting to the beach. We will be staying in a house that some friends are renting for I don't know how long, we'll see. Oh and I got a bit side tracked, but the boat party, back to the boat party. It was brilliant. It was so surreal to be dancing on a party boat down the Ganges and watching the burning ghats, which is human bodies that families are burning in ceremonies on the banks of the Ganges to send thier souls to Nirvana. Varanasi is full of people waiting to die. This is a place that is thought to be so holy they don't sell alcohol! Although we did have some on the boat. The party was full of beautiful people. I met this great Isreali named Ynon who I immediately felt like I had known forever. I love it when this happens. We had so much fun. I think everyone had a great time. And now we will all be meeting in Goa hopefully for the New Year. Goa is a Porteguese influenced region and the food is suppose to be amazing. The gilr I am traveling with is from Brazil, so she is excited about that. Anyway I better go and see some of the sights of Bombay. I think we are going to try to be extras in a Bollywood movie or something....

Christmas Eve Boat Party

It's Christmas Eve today and I am helping put together an all night boat party to float down the Ganges with about 50 other travelers. The past few days have been so remeniscent of my life in San Francisco getting ready for Jason's wonderful Sunset boat parties. I miss this part of our life together terribly. I'm doing the decorations, as I have in the past, and I'm having a great time. There is a wating list for the party that is almost as long as the list of people who will be on the boat...oh it feels like home. It's funny, I coulnd't be doing anything else that would make me feel less homesick. Well I will write more tomorrow....I'm off to the flower market for deocorations....and then the anticipation...the butterflies nin the stomach.....the perfect dress and a flower in the buns for good measure. Boat parties will forever be one of the greatest events of my life....and this time on the Ganges

Varanasi....so much a photo could not say

Varanasi is a crazy city, and everyone will tell you that. I love it....Rigth now we have a place with a balcony right on the Ganges.....Meer Ghat....Lu and I that is. It is magic. You know traveling everything is happening so fast there are so many photos you just can't get. And on this trip there have been so many holy places and situations where taking a photo was just not approriate. I mean no one would come into one of my religious ceremonies snapping photos, I would hope. So when I see it happen here I cring.....So the photos I could not take. Last night a few of us were chilling out on the rooftop deck of our guest house and all of a sudden I notice monkeys are slowly surrounding us. I reach for a camera and just as I'm about to take a photo there is a monkey turk war right on the table in front of us. I'm screaming and the monkeys all run off, so it's over just as soon as it had started....then we leave the guest house to meet friends for dinner. On the way we wlk along the Gange and we see a crowd off Indians crowding around an English guy in a top hat. He was a street preformer....hillarious and magical and the whole thing was just brilliant. At the end of the show he said Thank you but I want no money. Just take with you a smile and share this good feeling with another.....in India everything is about money and everyone is selling you something, so I thought this was a novel idea for spreading a good feeling. After this a man dressed as Santa Claus comes up to me, which just is off in India and the Santa Claus had a terrifying squeezed face....I wouldsn't shake his hand. I felt like a child going to see Santa at the department store for the first time. India is crazy and I love it.

Back in the Delhi....with a Delhi Belly

I really think stomach problems in India is unavoidable. I mean I guess one could just stop eatting. Which I am seriously considering. Or at least be careful.....but I've never been careful about eatting. I mean by "watching my diet" this literally means I watch what food I put on my plate and I watch myself eat it. And I love every minute of this process, but I don't eat differently because of what I have seen. I am just an observer. Oh but the Delhi belly is getting me down, but not slowing me down, so this is just fine. I've been allergic to diary my whole adult life and have always eaten cheese and ice cream, so this isn't to much different.

And now entering Delhi is a whole different ball of wax. I was terrified.... mortified... shoked in a way that it is difficult for the brave Miss Orange to openly admit. Surviving Delhi and obtaining some level of comfort as a single young lady, who doesn't look a day over 21 I'm coming to find, brings a fantasic feeling of accomplishment. And perhaps this is silly for me to find confidence in something that is in some respects a simple thing. I mean I conquered nothing except my own fears. And perhaps that is all I will even conquer.But this is not so bad to me right now.

Oh and sorry for the misspellings and so forth.....I know I'm becoming a school teacher and all that, but I'm on vacation.

REadjustments

Well so I'm having an interesting time getting used to life outside of a monastary. I've been in Katmandu for the past week living in this crazy little district called Thamel. There is every type of food you could possibly think of. Most of which are excellent, except for the Mexican restaurant. but what was I expecting I'm in Nepal. So funny thing. My entire time travelling....which is about 6 or 7 weeks now has been spent in room 205 or 305. That's in every hotel and even at the monastary. I don't know what the meaning of this is or if there is any, but as a buddhist would say "that is very aspicious". I'm enjoying Katmandu, but I'll be glad to leave tomorrow. I'm ready to run. And seeing the Dalhi Lama speak in Varanasi or Saranth sounds fantastic. I'll be in Bodagaya for Christmas, which should be gorgeous. A few kids from the retreat will be there as well. That will make it better...I don't think I will ever miss another Christmas. This is my second in a row, which is too many. In case my times in transit causes a lack in communication. Merry Christmas to all...and Happy New Year. I love you all more than words

Wow Photos!

Well I hope this truely worked. I'll be very excited if so, but quite surprised. I think this is a picture of the hill I sat on every afternoon to read, relax and talk about life and death and everything in between. This is Nick a wonderful friend who spent most of those afternoons on the hilltop with me. As you can see it was a great time.

So I made it through Kopan

Well that was everything. It was one of the most beautiful pages in the story of my life...and it was difficult as hell....And I laughed so hard and kind of learned to meditate a little bit....and I saw parts of myself that were hard to face, but I did, and parts of myself that make me so thankful and happy to be alive. And in the end I got what I was looking for and a bit more.
Our schedule everyday was quite rigorous and at times overwhelming. Coming in with an American "understanding" of what Buddhism is all about I was in for a shock. At times I even felt like I was at church camp.....and yes Bessie at times like I was in jail, but perhaps the most beautiful and tranquil jail. Like a jail for a white collar crime. I took in so much information and still have so much to research and read. Tibetian Buddhism is an enormous course of study, so one month is perhaps a good start. I'm not even going to begin to speak about emptiness. And the changes in any life are like moving mountains and the rise and setting sun "slowly, slowly" as they say in India. But the way I see the world and the people in it has shifted ever so slightly and just enough to make my heart full.
Buddhism is a science of the mind. It faces the world by exposing it's paradoxical nature. You meditate on death and begin to love life in a new way. Meditate on suffering and find your joy. Liberation from a self cherishing mind is a tough one though and I can't say I'm much closer then I was a month ago. I love and hate so many things, and love more than hate....but I really love a hot shower...LOVE. And the Oakland A's and even though they suck I still love the Raiders. I love a warm, soft bed, and chocolate and coffee and Fenton's Ice Cream (still). And perhaps meditations on impermanance will change this, but at this I don't see that happening anytime soon, honestly. I see the interconnected heart of humanity though and can no longer see a beggar and pass....and in India and Nepal that is quite often.
Reincarnation and Karma are subjects I was once aware of on a certain level, but they make so much more sense.....and are the subjects that will change my life.
And besides that I met the most beautiful people mind, body, soul, and spirit. Really angels. No boredom or lack of conversation and if you read anything on Buddhism read Milarepas biography, Living Buddha Living Christ and Sadartha.
And I could go on and on but I've been in a monastary for a month, so doing anything that does not involve sitting will be great for awhile.
I'm going down to Saranath, India to hear the Dahli Lama and then to Bodagaya, India to hear the Karmapa and then to Goa and then down south to do some yoga and then to the islands off the east coast. But that could all change tomorrow.....and probably will.
Hearing about Donald Bullcoming's death was a shock. And missing the funeral and meeting made it harder......I feel so far away. I had the monks do a medicine puja in his honor and went down to the stupa and found some Tibetian cedar and prayed and cedared myself....and cried all day. He was someone I thought would live forever no matter what. His strength made him seem invinsible....I don't understand. My prayers are with Helen and the kids. He effected so many of us.... my prayers are constant and with everyone. I really wish I could be in a meeting right now or soon. I'm overwhelmed. Nowing death is a part of life does not make it easier when faced with it. It just hurts and makes me feel dizzy. Losing my grandmothers and Donald all this year. Every moment we have with each other is so precious and our life is so fragile. Anyone of us could be taken at any moment. And everyone is precious to someone. I love you all and miss you so much right now. Any and all emails are greatly greatly appreciated. Thank you Jonathon and Bessie for being such faithful friends, and making me giggle. I love hearing about the details of all of your stories. They are all pecious to me. I pray for you all constantly.